i barfeds in our rink
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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