I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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