Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
be right there i have to get my cape
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize