he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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