Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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