you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
