He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
