So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
