i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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