sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We got so high we made milksteak
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
