I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
