Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize