Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
