Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
be right there i have to get my cape
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Then you guys just all showered together...?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
