she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize