You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
