I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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