hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
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