I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I think weed is turning my hair brown
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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