Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
