quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
