so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
you will always have a special place in my vag
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
