ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban