Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I am naked and annoyed.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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