Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
