Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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