I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
