My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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