I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
