After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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