I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize