fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
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can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
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I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I am mentally ready for anal.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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