kristin has been a bad kristin
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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