Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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