is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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