Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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