I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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