come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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