Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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