i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
