So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
