She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
