On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
You are the jesus of drinking
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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