we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
