a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
