i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
