Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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