I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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