Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
