Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
