you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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